Sweet Baby Mae

Mae is still in the infant room at her daycare.  The teachers there are excellent.  One of them has been at the center for over 20 years!  She is wonderful with the babies, but is pretty quiet and serious.  Today we were talking about how Mae is "graduating" to the older baby room in a few weeks.  And she said, "Mae is the sweetest and best behaved older baby we have ever had in here."  I asked her to clarify "best behaved."  She said most babies her age bug the little babies - take their pacifiers, poke them, etc.  But not my Mae!  Sweet Mae just minds her own business. 

I guess what she lacks in hair she makes up for in charm!

I know you all are thinking that this teacher is just being nice.  But no way.  She tells it like it is.  When Andrew was moving to the big baby room I asked her if he was the worst eater she has ever had.  She said no.  He was the second worst eater.  Which is much better - right? 

Happiness comes from within

So I saw that Mackenzie-Childs was having a post holidays sale.  So I took a look.  So I went a little crazy.  So the UPS man could barely carry the box.  So what?

Totally not creepy that I took a picture of the UPS man out my window.  I was just a little excited about the contents of that box!

I just LOVE their stuff.  Kevin doesn't get it.  I tell him it is pretty and it makes me happy.  Now I understand that happiness can only come from within and all that enlightened nonsense, but how can you look at this and not smile? 

Yes, I know it is just a canister.  But a flowery canister with a big jeweled knob on top!

I was asking the kids what to put in it.  Andrew said coffee.  Grace said Mae's pacifiers.  I am thinking tootsie rolls.  Or I could just fill the whole thing up with wine and use it as a glass.  That would make me really happy. 

I deserved that

Yesterday, Andrew wouldn't leave with me to pick up Gracie at school. So he ended up in the car without a coat or shoes. I will spare you the details, but it wasn't pretty.

I got him to stop clawing out of his carseat by telling him I would have to call the police. That worked.

So later in the day, I told Andrew that he needed to go in his room until his father got home. He was clearly annoyed. So he walked over to the door, started saying numbers and pressing on his hand like it was a phone. Then he put the "phone" up to his ear and said, "Hello? Fireman? You need to come get my mom. (long pause) Because she is crazy."

I guess I have been giving Andrew a hard time on here lately. So I guess I deserved that.

Sisters!

the three year old insanity

Andrew is a wonderful, funny and sweet little boy.  For instance, yesterday he refused to wear his spiderman sweatshirt because one of the daycare teachers is "scared" of him in it (it has a little hood with a mask).  I assured him that she wasn't really scared and she would be OK with him wearing it.  But he refused, insisting that he did not want to scare her. 

See?  Sweet.  However, he is a three year old. And along with this sweetness, comes what I can only refer too as, "The Three Year Old Insanity."   Terrible Twos?  I think not. Three is the new two.  But is MUCH WORSE.  Take note all you pediatricians and child development experts that read this blog (I know you are out there)! 

Pretty much every single decision point in Andrew's day is an opportunity for him to hone his negotiating (or tantruming) skills.  I understand he is just trying to figure out the world around him and what he can and cannot control.  But jeez!  Give it a rest Little Buddy! 

I have figured out that I need to be very calculated about what I say and how I react.  Sometimes I just give him whatever he wants (see the example below), and other times I need to make him think I want the opposite.  I need to make him feel like he is getting exactly what he wants, exactly the way he wants it, and that it was all his idea.  Sometimes need to do that with Kevin too. 

"You can wear any shoes but these."
"Oh no, don't wear this sweater!  It is a big boy sweater and you are too little for this one."
"Oh no goodness!  It is waaaaaay too hot to put your pants back on!"

Mentally exhausting. 

If all three year olds are like this, by the time Mae is four I will be highly skilled in reverse psychology and negotiation.  So skilled, that I could get a job doing this type of work.  Wait where do they use these skills?  Schools?  Daycares?  I'll pass.

Here is an example of how tedious the simple act of getting Andrew a snack is....
"Do you want string cheese?" Me
"No" Andrew
"Okay."
"Maybe I do need string cheese."
"Okay" I walk towards the fridge....
"Noooo! I get it!"
"Okay."  I stop walking....
"Nooo! You get it!"
"Okay."  I resume walking....
"Noooo! I get it!"
"Okay."  I stand still, not sure what to do.
"Noooo! How 'bout we both get it! That be a good idea!"
1 minute later
"Mommy, I lick the string cheese. Then I eat it"
"Okay."  Not going to argue with you on that one!

Life with Andrew. Never dull. Oh wait...that was really dull.

Human Kleenex

Thats me!  I constantly have someone else's snot and drool and who knows what else on my shoulder. Instead of letting it bother me, I choose to view it as an accessory, like a fancy new necklace or fun scarf.   Whatever.  And if I had a dollar for everytime I heard, "Uh mom?  I got poop on my shirt trying to wipe my butt."  Well you can guess where this is going with that.

"Oh that crazy Bridget.  She is just used to the gross kid stuff now that she has three kids." 

Nope!  This lack of disgust with your child's bodily fluids kicks in from birth.  Just hand me that gooey, cheesey newborn please!  When Mae was born, she immediately pooped on me and I felt bad about asking for a new hospital gown.  Like I was being high maintenance or something.  And the nurses were going to start complaining about me in the halls.  I said, "Uh oh, she pooped on me!  Oh well, it isn't the first and won't be the last time I have poop on my shirt."  Cue awkward laugh from me and weird look from the nurse and doctor.   

I took Grace into the office to meet my co-workers when she was about 8 months old.  I was holding her and someone said, "Uh, did you know that she just used your hair to wipe her nose?"  I totally didn't notice.  Of course.  But was like, "Oh yeah, uh whatever, she does that all the time."  Cue awkward laugh from me and weird look from everyone within earshot.

Have I mentioned that I am socially awkward? 

There have been many more times than I would care to admit that I have found myself with poop on myself and been shockingly unfazed by the situation.  Thinking to myself, "Huh, wonder when that happened?  Better clean that up sometime in the near-ish future!"  Which is interesting since if there is anything like that (ie. poop or boogers) where it shouldn't be in my house (like the bathroom floor or toilet seat or car seat or bed), I am all over it with disinfectant. 

So I need my house to be clean, but I don't need to be clean myself?  Odd standards.

Finally, this morning in bed Mae used my face...  MY FACE!  Specifically my lips.  MY LIPS!  To wipe her nose.  Maybe she is just getting me back for calling her "booger face" and singing that repeately to the tune of Lady Gaga's "Poker Face"?

I am going to go take a shower.

I am including this picture because I think every post needs a picture.  I was going to find one of Mae with a booger face.  Or one of me with dirty clothes on.  But instead I thought I would post a cute picture.  This was taken right around Grace's 2nd birthday.  I was pregnant with Andrew and we were on a Johnson Family Cruise.  I am sure when Grace was done with whatever she was eating she used my dress as a napkin.

Christmas Morning

The Santa that visits our house is pretty low key.  He brings some toys and a few practical things.  Like new toothbrushes.  WOOHOO!

Andrew consistently told us he wanted Santa to bring him a Jake and the Neverland Pirates Ship and a drill.  Santa delivered and Andrew was thrilled.

The kids all got this broom and dustpan set so they can keep the playhouse clean.

Grace wanted a microphone and hair chalk. 

And Mae didn't want anything.  But Santa did bring her a book, a doll and a cute little toy egg set. 

Because you have been driving me crazy

Because you freak out for no reason at all.

Because you hit your big sister.
Because you take all the pillows in the house and pile them in the living room.  Every day.
Because you insist I take off my shoes to show you my toes.
Because you won't eat the suckers I give you if "they be too dark."
Because you make me wear my hair in a pony tail.
Because you torment me when I am wiping your butt by insisting on a particular technique.
Because I had to hear that you tackled another child at daycare.
Because you ignore me no matter how loud I yell your name, but when I say "Oh look!  A digger outside!" you come running. 
Because you scream when I cannot find that song you want on you tube, when the only description provided is, "You know, the one we heard last week." 
Because you ate your sister's donut yesterday when no one was looking.
But mostly because we love you Andrew and your cute little tush!

Christmas Eve

 

We had a nice and quiet Christmas Eve with the Darnieder group.  Well, as quiet as it could be with this crew.  The highlight of my day may have been when Andrew ran out of the bathroom at church and yelled in the most excited voice, "Mommy!  I did a big poop in the potty!"  Which reminded me of my favorite Norm MacDonald quote from SNL, "Kenny G has a Christmas album out this year. Hey, happy birthday, Jesus! Hope you like crap!"

I hosted dinner.  And here are a few snapshots from the evening.

 The decor.

 

 

 

 

Grace loved the cake pops for dessert and her fancy new dollhouse!

Andrew got some cool new trucks!

 

 

 Mae enjoyed the fire.

 

 JuJu loved having her whole family together.

And Pop Pop got a little silly!

Artwork

Andrew made this for me this weekend.  He cut up scraps of paper and glued them on top of and under a notebook.  Not sure this is a keeper. 

 

From Grace...."I am Saint Grace.  I am a saint because I love everyone and God." 

Dinnertime

I dread the dinner hour these days.  Actually, I hate it.  Nothing is more annoying.  Nothing highlights all of my many parenting shortcomings like the dinner hour.  I love having people over for dinner, but I really hate subjecting them to the chaos.

Grace and Andrew act insane and spend the entire time complaining about the meal I just made them.  Then they try to negotiate their way out of eating it. 

"It have parts!  I not want that!  AHHHH!  THAT BE YUCKY! THAT BE A VEGETABLE!  GET IT OFF MY PLATE!" Andrew

"Uh Mom, how much do I have to eat?  Can I just eat like one piece?  If I eat two pieces can I have dessert?" Grace

They argue over who gets to say their prayer first. Which usually ends up with someone yelling a prayer, someone crying, and me making some ridiculous, unenforceable threat about not being allowed to pray.

As soon as I sit down, I am repeatedly asked for more milk!  A napkin!  More water! A spoon!  A different spoon!  No the little spoon!  No the big spoon!  Ketchup!  A hot dog!  I could go on and on and on.

And they look so innocent don't they?

On the other hand, Miss Mae is a little angel at dinner. 

 She will eat whatever we put in front of her.  Tonight she had ham, chicken, pizza, cheerios, pineapple and applesauce!

Although she misses her mouth a lot and leaves quite a mess under her high chair, she will actually clean it up.  I simply put her on the floor after dinner and she acts like a little vacuum cleaning up all the food.  I am not kidding.  I just tell myself she is working on her fine motor skills and building immunity at the same time.  Multi-tasking at such a young age.  Impressive!

 See?  She has a little piece of shredded cheese in her hand.  Excellent pincer grasp.

 

9 month Mae

Kindergarten - already!

I just registered Andrew today for next school year. He will be young, but we are going to try him out in k4 and see how it goes. And no, he did not take off those sweet shades the entire time we were in the school office. Watch out ladies, Mr. Cool is going to school!