Recently 4

I have hit a bit of a rough patch lately.  My back is getting better, but it is pretty fatigued and I seem to have a lot of painful flare-ups.  Riding in the car is hard, and it seems like I need to drive the kids somewhere everyday.  Bending and lifting is particularly hard on me.  And that is basically all I do, so that's not working out so well.   This means I am approaching everything I do in a cloud of pain and exhaustion.

We also seem to have more going on than usual.  We have several house projects going on and the to-do lists keep growing.  There isn't even a good time to make a phone call!  

Andrew is potty training and he is doing a fabulous job.  He is basically potty trained, except he has some sort of GI condition.  We have to manage that with fiber and laxatives and finding that "sweet spot" with is diet and medicines is a challenge.  I have spent many hours lying in bed in the middle of the night with thoughts running through my head....."What if I give him 1 teaspoon of miralax and 1 tsp of benefiber every morning?  Or 2 tsp of miralax?  Or 2 tsp benefiber?"
"I could given him prune juice in a little tylenol cup!  It is his favorite color - purple! He loves tylenol!"
"Should I take him to a specialist?  What if he never is potty trained and he craps his pants until he is an adult?  He will never have a girlfriend!  And he loves the single ladies!"
(Please, please do not look at my google history.)

 

(Yes, we will have those ugly counters....someday they will be honed granite...someday.)

On the other hand, he is soooo proud of himself which is adorable.  We sing "Go Andrew, go Andrew, go go go Andrew!"  while he goes.  And he likes to say, "Here it comes!" with a big smile on his face.   He loves his rewards, skittles for #1 and his beloved goldfish for #2.  Goldfish are now only a potty training reward.  (Because we just cannot control ourselves around them unless there are strict limits.)   Of course Andrew has an elaborate hand washing routine and loves to run around pantless....which means I have little piles of shorts, undies and diapers all over my house and we have to say things like, "Get your penis off of the ottoman!". 

Grace is great.  Her activities have died down, which is nice.  However, her constant exuberance and inquisitive nature (she asks questions about everything, all day) coupled with my lack of patience, are not the best fit.  We have conversations that go like this...
"Grace please do not ask me any more questions for the next 2 minutes.  Please."  (I plead in a desperate voice.)
"Huh?  What?  No more questions?"
"Yes!"
"So you don't want me to ask you ANYTHING for the next 2 minutes.  Right?"
Continue this basic pattern until I lose it and send everyone to their room.

Poor Mae has numerous benign, yet annoying conditions that require management.
1. She eats constantly.
2. She cries a lot, unless she is being held.
3. She does not sleep through the night.  She has 3 times so far, and I am being generous as she really just slept from 10-4am or 5am. 
(Yes, I do know she is a baby.)
4. She has a blocked tear duct which requires eye drops and frequent massages of the duct, which is super fun.

 

(Here is my dining room table, now a changing table.  Yes, that is a poopy diaper next to a crystal bowl.)

5. She has persistent diaper rash that precludes the usage of wipes, necessitates multiple creams, and now we trying weird bleach free diapers.

I am going back to work in a few weeks, and I think I am ready.  Actually, I know I am ready.  I think I need a little exposure to something other than taking care of my house and kids....you see, I have been having dreams (well, lets call them what they really are, fantasies) about the following:

1. A minivan with auto close on the rear hatch (it won't hurt my back to close my trunk then).
2. A pantry, so I can actually see what is in my cupboards without climbing onto a chair or getting on my hands and knees (again, hard on my back) and a normal size refrigerator.
3.  That I wasn't insane and actually allowed myself to hire a bit of cleaning help.  
4. A trip anywhere without having to buckle three kids into three car seats.  And I don't mean like a vacation trip.  I mean like a grocery store trip.  Right now, going to Walgreens alone feels like I just went on a 5 star spa vacation. 
5. Spending money on something other than visits to the doctor, physical therapist, the chiropractor, weird SI joint lock belts, lumbar pillows, prescriptions and various OTC laxative medications.   
6. A day where the only poop I have to deal with is my own.

Think I need to get out a bit????