Human Kleenex

Thats me!  I constantly have someone else's snot and drool and who knows what else on my shoulder. Instead of letting it bother me, I choose to view it as an accessory, like a fancy new necklace or fun scarf.   Whatever.  And if I had a dollar for everytime I heard, "Uh mom?  I got poop on my shirt trying to wipe my butt."  Well you can guess where this is going with that.

"Oh that crazy Bridget.  She is just used to the gross kid stuff now that she has three kids." 

Nope!  This lack of disgust with your child's bodily fluids kicks in from birth.  Just hand me that gooey, cheesey newborn please!  When Mae was born, she immediately pooped on me and I felt bad about asking for a new hospital gown.  Like I was being high maintenance or something.  And the nurses were going to start complaining about me in the halls.  I said, "Uh oh, she pooped on me!  Oh well, it isn't the first and won't be the last time I have poop on my shirt."  Cue awkward laugh from me and weird look from the nurse and doctor.   

I took Grace into the office to meet my co-workers when she was about 8 months old.  I was holding her and someone said, "Uh, did you know that she just used your hair to wipe her nose?"  I totally didn't notice.  Of course.  But was like, "Oh yeah, uh whatever, she does that all the time."  Cue awkward laugh from me and weird look from everyone within earshot.

Have I mentioned that I am socially awkward? 

There have been many more times than I would care to admit that I have found myself with poop on myself and been shockingly unfazed by the situation.  Thinking to myself, "Huh, wonder when that happened?  Better clean that up sometime in the near-ish future!"  Which is interesting since if there is anything like that (ie. poop or boogers) where it shouldn't be in my house (like the bathroom floor or toilet seat or car seat or bed), I am all over it with disinfectant. 

So I need my house to be clean, but I don't need to be clean myself?  Odd standards.

Finally, this morning in bed Mae used my face...  MY FACE!  Specifically my lips.  MY LIPS!  To wipe her nose.  Maybe she is just getting me back for calling her "booger face" and singing that repeately to the tune of Lady Gaga's "Poker Face"?

I am going to go take a shower.

I am including this picture because I think every post needs a picture.  I was going to find one of Mae with a booger face.  Or one of me with dirty clothes on.  But instead I thought I would post a cute picture.  This was taken right around Grace's 2nd birthday.  I was pregnant with Andrew and we were on a Johnson Family Cruise.  I am sure when Grace was done with whatever she was eating she used my dress as a napkin.